Starting over really is starting over!

I know that models struggle with body image and weight issues constantly throughout their careers. Just about a year ago, I chose to start dieting and exercising, not because of a negative body image or to help my career, but for health concerns. I have a lot of weight associated health issues in my family history. I decided that more than ever, now was the time to drop the weight and keep it off as a complete lifestyle change. It worked, and I dropped about 30 pounds last year. The problem now, is that I have trouble wearing what is in my wardrobe. The majority of those clothes don't fit me anymore, and I can't just go out and buy a whole new wardrobe. Thus, I'm finding it difficult to pick out clothes for photo shoots. With respect to my pictures, as I was looking at my online profile today, I basically have to start from scratch. Nothing I have really works because of the weight loss, as I look significantly changed. Even old tearsheets aren't valuable enough anymore. Not only am I jumpstarting the modeling career again, I literally have to start over! I'm kind of freaking out just a little. Just saying.

So, it's really difficult to decide you want to be a model. The idea of it is really quite easy, but the effort and work put into it can be extremely tough. You really have to think hard about why you want to do this and ask yourself how much work you are actually going to put into it. It's taken me a long time to think about this, and I feel for the most part that I have just been running scared, for my seemingly incapability to model was seen only by me and I worried that this truth would be exposed to the world had I decided to actually work at. Truth is, I'm not incapable of modeling; I'm just a woman who has struggled a lot with body image. The fact is, I have succeeded at pretty much everything I've ever tried in life. Being as tough as this industry is, and me being only 5'3" tall, I feared failing for the first time in my life.

It's a new year now, and I'm not getting any younger. It's time to put up or shut up. I dropped a lot of weight last year, changed my eating habits, and have really become the person that I want to be in my personal life. It's now time to work on the professional part of my life. I am moving to Richmond, Virginia. I don't know much about the area and have lived in the south for the majority of my life. This will be a new experience for me and I am excited! I know there will be a wealth of new opportunity and I'm looking forward to the crazy new experiences to come. I know that no one reads this, but if you do, I look forward to hearing what you have to think about life, modeling, what it's like to start a completely new career... I have the talent to do this. It's been seen by the several photographers I've worked with. Hopefully someone out there will see it to and take a chance on me. No one does that anymore it seems. No one works as a patron of the arts, taking someone under the wing of experience and teaching anymore. Either way, I'm ready to start doing what I have to do to make a difference in the lives of my family and my new community, and I can't wait to see what awaits me in the wonderful near future!